The Crazy And Worst Ever Men’s Shoe Trends

Crocs

There is no amount of solace that legitimizes wearing punched-through neon froth. Notwithstanding when nobody's looking. 

Crocs are best decorated with a minister's propensity since they promise you'll be just as chaste. We're genuinely certain that this mongrel posterity of a jam shoe and divider protection is referenced in Revelations as a harbinger of the Rapture, so we'd prompt you instantly expel any samples in your closet and swap for a couple of espadrilles tout de suite, or you wind up cooking in the unceasing flames of punishment. Whatever your podiatrist claims

Try Instead: Espadrilles

Mulo Suede Espadrilles, available at Mr Porter, priced £115.

Men’s Ugg Boots

Uggs are surely Australia’s retaliation for homing 160,000+ British criminals. Mankind has never needed an all-terrain slipper, yet still they infest high streets; it could be an urban legend but they say that in London, you’re never more than six feet away from an Ugg.

Fortunately, Nike’s design department invented the sneakerboot: a less offensive but still foot-friendly way to battle winter. Sacrifice your Uggs on the pyre in thanks.

Try Instead: Sneakerboots

Nike Max 90 Sneakerboot, available at Size?, priced £115.

Winklepickers

Try Instead: Round-Toed Shoes

IRRON2 Classic Leather Derby Shoes, available at Ted Baker, priced £130.

Undone Biker Boots

Curse the "brother" and his capacity to sully the generally wearable. It's a style law that, six months after David Beckham leads something, it's old fashioned obligingness of a clique of men who just upgrade their closet in light of his appearances in the Daily Mail's sidebar of disgrace (larger than usual beanie, we scarcely knew ye). 

While you sit tight for them to proceed onward, stick to exemplary Chelsea boots.

Try Instead: Chelsea Boots

R.M. Williams Leather Chelsea Boots, available at Mr Porter, priced £295.

Vibram 5 Fingers

[Interior: Synergy Direct Branding Agency. Two men sit either side of a half-exhaust pack of cocaine] 

Imaginative one: Is there a light over my head? 

Imaginative two: [Raising his head from the line before him] You've had a thought? 

Innovative one: OK – prepare yourself. Gloves… for your feet! 

Innovative two: You mean shoes? 

Innovative one: No. Since these – sit tight for it – cover every toe! Separately! Like a glove! 

Innovative two: Wouldn't that be unimaginably unreasonable? Also, more tastefully confused than taking the Elephant Man to a lobby of insane mirrors? 

Imaginative one: Probably. Be that as it may, individuals still wear Crocs. 

Imaginative two: Pub? 

[Fade to dark on two turning office chairs] 

How about we simply stick to coaches, OK?

 Minimal Performance Trainers

adidas Stan Smith Primeknit, available at END Clothing, priced £95.

Cowboy Boots

Try Instead: Brogue Boots

Tricker’s Stow Brogue Boot, available at END Clothing, priced £390.

Square-Toed Shoes

Attempt Instead: Round-Toed Oxfords 

Barker Winsford Goodyear Welt Leather Oxford Shoes, accessible at John Lewis,priced £180.